Santana pushed Brittany lightly so she fell onto her back and onto the bed. Brittany sunk into the comfy mattress and put her hands around the Latinas neck, pulling her down to make their lips meet once again. Santana ran her fingers through Brittany's soft blonde hair as they continued to kiss, not wanting any space between them. Brittany tried to come up for air, but the Latina barely let her get a breath before making their lips meet once again. Brittany reluctantly continued to kiss her, but knew in her heart it was wrong, and her smile started to slightly fall. Santana, oblivious to the Blondes reluctance, slowly dragged her tongue across Brittany's lower lip trying to gain full mouth access. Full mouth access was always granted between the two, so when Brittany's already shaky smile turned into a frown and she pulled away, Santana wondered what she had done wrong. Santana let out a small, almost inaudible, whimper, but quickly recovered and put her mouth into the all too familiar grumpy smirk.
" began Brittany cleverly using her pet name, trying to lighten the mood and get the Latina to smile. It had the exact opposite effect, and Santana crossed her arms, put her back to Brittany, and scooted to the edge of the bed. Brittany sighed, expecting this to happen. "Pleeeeeease, Sany?" begged the Blonde. She scooted over and rested her chin on the other girls shoulder.
"Britt, no." Santana growl-whispered before trying to shrug her off.
"Please Sany. Why can't we talk?" pleaded the Blonde, who in response got a heavy sigh and a vigorous head shake."Whyyyyyy nooooooooot?" she whined and stuck out her lower lip in a cute, silent protest. Brittany let out another sigh and slumped down in defeat, not knowing what to do. She tried to think about what to do with the pouting Santana, but the only thing she could think about was Lord Tubbington and how she was sure he was starting to smoke weed again. She had found some mysterious green flakes by his food bowl. Then, Brittany realized that she knew Santana more than anyone else, and she knew how to make her laugh.
" she began, a small smile playing on her face. Once again she was ignored, so she put her plan into action. She dug her finger into Santanas ribs making the Latina fight, but eventually winning and the smaller girl broke out into a smile and giggles. "Hah! It worked!" the Blonde cried.
"Britt, stop! Stop!" cried Santana and slapped the other girls hand away, and not very nicely.
"Owww!..." pouted Brittany and rubbed her hand.
"Fine, we can talk, Brittany." Santana emphasized saying her full name instead of the usual B, Britt, or Britt Britt. The Blonde didn't pick up on this, but instead hugged the smaller girl and planted a quick kiss on her cheek mumbling a 'thanks' in the process. Brittany tried to pull Santana down, but she protested. "What?" she snapped.
"Hold me, Sany?" she asked innocently just like a little child would. "You know you want to
" she teased causing Santana to smile and nod her head. She fell back onto the bed, opening her arms to the Blonde, who quickly snuggled up to her with a smile. "Thanks, Sany." She whispered and pulled the other girls arm tighter around her waist. Santana took her free hand and rubbed circles on Brittany's back.
"No problem, Britt Britt." She answered naturally. The two girls lay to gether in comfortable scilence, Brittany smiling and laying in Santanas arms, Santana rubbing circles on her backs also sporting a similar smile, before the silence was broken.
"Sany, we need to talk now." Demanded Brittany lightly, not wanting to light the Latinas short fuse again.
"Britt, I don't want to lose you." Blurted Santana and instantly tightened her arms around the Blonde to prove her point. Brittany smiled while patting Santana's hand. The Latina tentatively ran her fingers under Brittany's hand, not knowing if this was the time to attempt that, but Brittany just intertwined their fingers. Santana absentmindedly stroked Brittany's back with her hand as the other girl began to talk.
"Now Sany, I know this is a tough subject for you
" trailed Brittany, expecting an argument from the Latina, who was unnaturally quiet. "But I need to finish what I was saying at the park before things got
Out of hand." Brittany took a deep breath before continuing. "Like I said, I understand everything. I understand that you're Lebanese, and I'm bi-curious." Santana opened her mouth to protest, but Brittany shushed her. "Santana, I love you more than anyone else in the world, but if you argue with me, or interrupt me, I will leave." She threatened.
"Santana Lopez, as I said before, I know I'm bi-curious, and I know I love you, and I know I love Artie. I also know that you're Lebanese, and you love me, but you're scared of your feelings. I know you've never really said you're Lebanese out loud, but I know you better than anyone else, maybe even better than yourself, and I know the way you look at me, the way you touch me, the way you make me feel, the way I make you feel
You've never felt it with any other guys. But whenever I try to talk to you, try to hold your hand in the choir room, you push me away, Santana. Santana, I want this," she raised their handhold into the air, "more than you know. But you won't let me." Brittany's voice slowly began to raise.
"I'm not the smartest person in the world, Santana. We both know that. But, if there was a Santana 101 class, I would ace it. So do you know what us means to me? It means I'm just your silly little sex game. Let's see how long I can make out with Brittany and have sex with her before my mom comes home! Let's see how fast she can climb out the window when my family comes home! Santana, like I said at the park, I understand. I understand how you feel about me. I understand how you love me, and want this as much as I do, and I understand how you're afraid of the labels, and I understand how you look at me and touch me behind closed doors, and I understand how you make me feel dirty by doing this. By telling me sex isn't dating, it's just friends talking with their tongues super close and how it's ok because the plumbing's different. I also understand what Artie has told me, and how that's not right, and I understand how you're using me." Brittany closed her eyes and took a deep breath finishing her rant. Santana processed everything Brittany just said, and to her horror realized everything she said was true. Santana was silent before letting everything out. Tears streamed down her face and she stumbled and choked over her words.
Never going to again
" sobs wracked her body and she fell down into the pillows. Brittany seemed to forget everything she just said because she instantly went into protection mode.
I'm so sorry! It just
Poured out of me! Everything I've been feeling for forever! It feels so good to get out, but not to see you cry. You must be rubbing off on me, huh?" she joked lightly. After a few minutes, Santana slowly rose from the pillow.
"No hard feelings, okay Britt?" she sniffled. "I promise I will not do anything with you until you break up with Artie." She breathed, almost not believing how much the Blonde could change her.
"Fine." She agreed. "But no more rubbing off on me! Be nice!" she teased and waggled a finger in Santana's face. Santana shook her head, laughing.
"I just want one more thing, Brittany." She didn't give time for the Blonde to ask what before she continued. "I want you to hug me, and tell me it's going to be okay." Brittany smiled and opened her arms for the Latina. She hugged her tightly, not letting go.
"Santana, we are going to fight through this. I love you, and everything is going to be okay." Santana smiled, locked in the Blondes embraced, happier than she had ever been before.